Walter Isaacson's book, Steve Jobs, is a good companion piece to Brennan-Jobs memoir, Small Fry. Isaacson gives you the facts and some psychological distance. Brennan-Jobs gives you the toll that such a person as Jobs takes on others, especially their children. The author presents herself as a fairly model child in this memoir; hard-working, easy going, straight-A student, doing all the right things, looking out for her needy mother and unpredictably demanding father, striving no less for Harvard, all in spite of two selfish parents, who look out for themselves the most, that she has to rely upon for her start in life. We have to take the author largely at her word, but given Isaacson's reporting, she is probably very accurate.

In fact, the reader may be left wondering how Lisa can be as forgiving as she is. Her mother seems needy, dependent, unable to get going with her life, stuck. Her father, Steve Jobs, publicly disowns her, going so far as to lawyer up and dispute the indisputable DNA results. He seems to enjoy opportunities to demean her and mess with her mind--the examples riddle the book, especially during her fragile teen years, when she tries to get close to him and forge a true father-daughter relationship. Unfortunately, such an effort is a two-way street, and this guy operates strictly on self-interest in all things. Her wish to know if the Lisa computer was named for her is an effort to see whether deep down, she really has value in his eyes, is special as his daughter. He outright denies it in the cruelest way for years, until he grudgingly admits it as true in her presence, to Bono of U2, of all people, almost as an offhand comment.

During her high school years, she is essentially the live-in nanny, trying to balance school work, extra curricular activities, and the endless demands of Jobs and his wife for baby sitting and cleaning, with no encouragement, no expression of love or appreciation. Even nannies are paid for their labor. Her pathetic attempts to receive crumbs of love are painful to watch. The crowning blow, when Lisa persuades Jobs and his wife Laurene to have a session together at her psychiatrist as a family (what a joke!), and Lisa begs to at least receive a "good night" a couple of nights a week, and breaks down in tears, all Laurene can say is, "We're cold people." Top this emotional abuse off with sexual abuse of forced voyeurism-- requiring Lisa to remain present while Jobs sexually gropes and makes out with his wife, a "family moment."

The constant denials of money for even the most basic needs, and outright denial of support in any form, finally led her to seek refuge at his next door neighbor's home, where this couple took her in, helped her graduate high school, and even paid a year's worth of college bills before Jobs finally grudgingly paid up. Lisa's quest to understand her father, to find some explanation for his behavior, to find some way he expressed deep down feelings of love for her--it all so misses the point. Steve Jobs was completely abusive of Lisa, emotionally, neglectful, ugly, cruel, even sexually, if not physically. While I believe she came clean in this book, and was entirely truthful as she could be, I suspect he was even worse to her than this. During their skating activities, when Jobs would insist Lisa ride on his shoulders, then inevitably tumble, with both getting banged up--I suspect there was more to this than reported.

The abusive attitudes were embedded in the family, when years later, when Jobs is in the last weeks of life, Lisa visits monthly, during her younger half sister's birthday party. When the child's friend asks who this adult is, Eve Jobs replies, "She'd my dad's mistake." It is clear the whole family rejected Lisa, which makes the reader wonder why she keeps trying to go back for love and acceptance. I hope Lisa Brennan-Jobs can move forward and forge healthier personal relationships of her choosing. This narrative goes beyond describing a complex person, Steve Jobs--it is a portrait of sociopathy, of character disorder run amok, which no amount of creativity or innovation can excuse, or should have been allowed by the adults around him.