Smartly constructed and emotionally poignant memoir of Grossi’s experiences both as a Marine in Afghanistan, and a returning veteran, Craig Grossi shines a light on the personal experience of being a Marine in relentlessly dangerous situations, then trying to adapt to normal life back home. The dog he found in Afghanistan, nicknamed Fred by his group of Marines, not only helped him survive the trauma of combat and loss of fellow Marines, he also helped him navigate the difficult path of integration, his life before and after Afghanistan. The story moves back and forth in time, between Grossi’s time as a Marine, and the road trip cross the United States that he takes with fellow veteran and good friend, Josh.

Grossi skillfully describes his experiences in Afghanistan as a collector of intelligence from people living in Taliban-controlled areas, as well as his attempts to build positive relationships with the locals. During their time spent in a remote compound, he observes a stray dog that seems quite unlike all the other strays he has seen— confident, traveling solo, friendly yet independent. They bond over beef jerky, kindness, and calm, peaceful time spent together. Fred is a piece of normalcy, a chance to forget the danger and traumatic possibilities of every moment in a combat zone. Grossi only fully recognizes much later how Fred helped him survive Afghanistan, to turn down the endless adrenaline-fueled alert one must be in to respond to attack and survive. To be able to disengage, if only a little, to care for another creature, to be playful— all helped to reduce the trauma.

Once at home in the U.S., Fred helps to open conversations about his experiences. We here at home have little to no frame of reference to understand what a veteran experiences in a combat zone, what it means to have your life at risk every moment, to have a normal exchange one moment, then be attacked and lose one’s friends or one’s self the next. To operate at that mental and physical tempo day after day for weeks and months, then try to return to the comforts of life in the U.S., seems a profoundly difficult integration to achieve. It must open a gulf between the soldier and their loved ones and friends, all of whom believe they know you so well, but cannot understand what you experienced and how it may have changed you. Grossi helps us begin to experience the challenges he and all veterans face, when trying to find the meaning of these experiences in their lives, and how it will inform their choices going forward.

When Grossi observes Fred’s reactions to their environment, such as road drainage areas, or fireworks, he understands that they have very different meanings coming from Afghanistan, and pose threats on a deep emotional level. He responds with a fight-or-flight response to what would have been threats, but are innocent here. It makes Grossi realize that he too has been left with these responses, which helped keep him alive in a different context, but make life difficult here. His task is to integrate his experiences, heal the trauma, create a peaceful, meaningful life that helps to normalize, heal, and find joy. He helps Fred, and Fred helps him. It is a beautiful story of how animals help humans heal, and find joy in life. It is also an important, well-told story of one veteran seeking to live a whole, happy, integrated life, after making the sacrifice of service to our country.

This is important reading for so many of us. I see value for active duty, their loved ones, and veterans alike, to read Grossi’s insightful work. Those of us with no military experience would greatly benefit from this book, gaining perspective on what veterans experience, and how we could better respond to them. When we understand that how we respond to our experiences is the most important thing, and how we offer love to those with us, we get the heart of Grossi’s story. I’m eager to read Grossi’s second book, Second Chances, and write about it here. Highly recommended.